I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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