Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I stole a fireplace last night.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
