it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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