I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
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