ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
