i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
