I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
