lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize