Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Randomize