Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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