C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
