u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize