belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
