All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I currently don't understand fingers.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
