I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
