I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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