the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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