we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
