Grow some girl-balls and come out already
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
