Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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