How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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