Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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