Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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