About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Randomize
