i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Randomize
