i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
There r osticjed everywhere
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Randomize
