No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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