I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize
