I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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