just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
