and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
