we have pet lesbian snakes
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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