You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Randomize
