Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
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