D3 body, D1 cock
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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