Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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