After last night, I could never be a politician.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
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