Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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