I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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