READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
