I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.