bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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