Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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