New invention idea: vibrating tampons
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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