I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
