you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
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