you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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