I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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