i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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