Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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