Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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