I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
